As most people know, I make an effort to get to the gym every day. Working out makes me feel a little better, gets my mind a little clearer, and makes me feel a little less guilty when I've just GOT to make a 50 cent Macy's ice cream cone run. Most mornings I make it, but Fridays are especially hard for me because I've got to be out the door for work by 8. That means early gym time... which takes me back to the good ol' days of Fitness 19 with Mom at 4:45... oh I do NOT miss those early mornings. Anyways, this morning I got up at 5:30, suited up, and went to Gold's with the intention of sweating it out at step class- the only class offered at 6 AM. I figured it wouldn't be that hard... I kind of remember my Mom doing step in the wee mornings of the early 90s, and from what I remembered, well, it wasn't anything I wasn't capable of. I got there in good time, found some space in the back corner, and sized up my competition. Meh- it was a handful of women in various walks of life, most 40s or 50s, and without a second thought I stretched out a little and prepared for what I thought would just be a nice little routine.
I was wrong.
Stepping is a cult. I don't know where these women learned it, but they were INSANE and I just stood there looking like a fool trying to mimic their footsteps as they did all these ridiculous moves and fancy footwork on that dumb bench. On a break one lady even turned to me and was like, "oh is this your first time? Don't be intimidated, just follow the footsteps.. you'll get a hold of it!"
I did not get a hold of it. I was almost crying with embarrassment, the hilariousness of the situation, and the fact that the stupid step was kicking my butt. Why the beep was I even here? I could tell all the women around me were pitying me... they didn't look directly at me, but conveniently the walls at Gold's are full of mirrors, therefore the graceful steppers watched me just trip over myself in the back corner. However, I was determined to stay the whole 45 minutes. I was determined not to relive the "hip hop class" incident of many moons ago.
But I am not that strong, turns out. After a big enough dose of embarrassment I stepped it right out of there with a "thanks for coming!" hollered at me from the instructor as I ran out of there, throwing back a big "ol' yeah..... you owned me" grin as I ran away.
You will find me at the treadmills from now on.